Yesterday, I shared this image I recently saw on Instagram. I posted it on my Insta stories when I found it and created a poll. I asked my audience if they believed that to be true for the most part. 78% of the people who voted, said yes.
In my personal experience, I’ve found this to be true. In fairness, I didn’t expect my partners to change, so much as be who they showed me they were during the earlier stages of our relationship. In both cases, I left. Granted, the first time around, it took me over 10 years and the second time, he left me I just didn’t go back.
I don’t expect my partner to change and honestly I don’t think it’s fair for me to. I do hope that they’ll grow but fundamentally change who they are? No. I wouldn’t want someone to want or expect me to change in order to be with them. If that’s the case, I’d just rather not be with them. If you can’t love me for who I am, as I am, then it’s just not a fit. I feel the same way when it’s the other way around. The tricky thing is, I want people to be who they show up as from the get go. I have to remember that it takes some people time to show you who they really are. Not that they’re bad, they just only show their good side and you don’t really know what you’re getting into…
So, no. I don’t think he’ll change because at the end of the day change is hard. And that’s when you want to initiate it. It has to come from you. If that’s not the case, then the change will probably be temporary and just enough to make things better for the short term. My hope is that he’ll want to grow and that desire comes from within himself.
As for men not thinking she’ll leave, think again. It might take some time. Probably much longer than it should. But when she’s fed up and had more than enough. When she realizes her worth. When she stands in the power of who she is… watch out because she’ll leave and never go back. So if you have a good thing, do what you have to in order for it to work. Whether it’s growing or showing you value one another. Don’t take each other for granted. Don’t forget that you each deserve the best. And if you’re waiting around for him to change, hunny don’t hold your breath. If he really wanted to, he would have by now. If you don’t think she’ll leave, well don’t be surprised when it finally happens.